christmas time is here

I'm part of what is most likely a very small group of people who finds the Christmas season depressing. Those old Christmas cartoons like It's Christmas Again Charlie Brown and the old Grinch movie, don't ask me why, make me depressed. Maybe it's hearing the lo-fi recording of the children's choir singing "Christmas time is here!" in their creepy dirge, and thinking how most of those kids are probably dead now.

Or when I'm stocking shelves in the toy section I look at a toy and imagine the kid who's going to come through, leaning over the side of the shopping cart, arms outstretched, wailing "I want that!!!" Then I see the toy a year from now, faded, dirty, and neglected under the bed.

Christmas lights are slutty. Plus nowadays everyone has those stupid white icicle lights that are in no way aesthetically pleasing, which makes the whole concept that much dumber.

Most Christmas carols remind me of when I was younger, and for some reason that depresses me too.

Probably the only reason I don't rip December off my calendar is the smell of Christmas. That's the only redeeming quality. I love it each year around late fall when I walk outside at night and catch that first whiff of thick, cool, winter air that smells faintly of smoke from some neighbor's chimney. To me, tolerating the Christmas season is worth it.